I Will Give her To You

Prior to Kathie and I marrying, I was married to another woman.  I say that I was married, but it was surely not God.  The girl that I married was the daughter of my mother's best friend.  Her family was Lebanese and was related to a large number of people in our home town.  Our marriage was the first joining of two very large families and was looked upon as a wonderful thing.  The two families had many friendships but a marriage was special.  I knew the girl that I was marrying from my childhood.  Her family lived across the street from both my mother and father's childhood homes.  We had Uncles, Aunts and cousins within houses from there, so no matter where I went within four blocks, I was related to people.

As the wedding grew closer, I knew that I was making a mistake.  I felt pushed to proceed but was too weak to stop the wedding. Everyone was so excited about us joining together and I surely didn't know about how spirits could compel you to do things.  The wedding went forward and the whole town was happy.  I am not exaggerating when I talk about the size of this event.  We had over two thousand people at our reception and after, people would come and say how sorry they were that they couldn't come.

Our marriage lasted 3 years and ended in a divorce,  The reason that she used in the divorce was that I would not raise any children that we might have in the Catholic faith, though this wasn't the actual reason.  She wanted a divorce because she could not let go of her family and live with me.  We were never joined together.  This was a legal marriage but not in the eyes of God.  Our parting was not a pleasant one and I was accused of many things that were not true.  Her family was ostracized from their own relatives because of the lies they told about me.  People knew that what was said wasn't true and confronted them resulting in her family actually leaving Pennsylvania. We swore to each other that we would not talk about the reasons we broke up to save the family but she did not keep that promise.  I did.   The reason that I tell this part is to give you understanding that I did not want to go through the pain of my first marriage/divorce ever again and when Kathie and I dated, I often told her that I was afraid of getting hurt again and that if she wanted to end up getting married, she should not expect me to be the one she married.

That leads me to Kathie and I.  We dated for about 4 years before we finally confronted the marriage thing.  Kathie told me that it was her desire to eventually marry and that if I was not willing to make that commitment, she would move on.  I told her that we should then break up.  After saying good by, I went to get in my car and leave.  While starting my car, I felt a presence in my car and heard a voice say "you are making a mistake".  Understand that at that time, I did not believe in God at all.  I could feel inside me that I was not doing the right thing, but I had to leave to catch a plane.  I was going to Chicago to open a restaurant and the whole trip up there and the first day, all I could think of was that I needed to call Kathie and that we needed to talk about getting married.  I couldn't reach her because she was out on a date.  It didn't take her long to move on.

At the opening, the Franchisee asked me what was wrong and I told them about what was going on.  He said that I needed to call her and work this out.  I was finally able to get her and I told her that we needed to talk when I got home.

Right after that, we both lost our jobs and I was hired by a restaurant company and moved to Dallas.  We were married before our trip and had a small ceremony in my parent's home.  God was there, and we didn't even know it.  After moving to Dallas, God brought us to Water of Life and began changing us.  One afternoon, while walking and praying, the spirit of God showed me a vision and told me about Kathie and I.  I am not one to have visions and cannot think of another one that I have had.  The vision was of Kathie and I walking side by side.  We came to a point where we split and she walked one way and I another.  At a point down the path, we came back together and walked on together.  God told me that He was going to separate us (not physically) and was going to change Kathie and then He would give her back to me the way He wanted her to be.  Though He did not say to me that He was also going to change me, I am sure that He has been doing that. 

God gave me my wife.  The Devil gave me the first girl I married.  When Kathie and I were married, many people said that we shouldn't get married or that I should have remained with my first wife. The jezebel did not want Kathie and I to marry.   The people that made those statements have either divorced or had problems because of what they said.  When God puts a man and wife together His word says:

Mark 10:9
What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder

Divorces take place because of either the hardness of our hearts or God did not put the people together.  You cannot simply decide that you want to marry, find someone and then get married and call it God.  Christian dating clubs are nothing but the flesh and are a good example of using God's name in vain.  God is well aware of who you are to marry.  He will bring you together and you will know because He will tell you.  If you are truly brought together by God, and walking in his word, your family or anyone else will not be able to separate you;

Ephesians 5

vs.31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.

One flesh cannot be divided.  Many marriages are broken up because a man has not, or could not leave his father or mother.  That word "leave" means to disregard.  Disregard what your parents or family says and obey God.  Miriam had an opinion about who Moses took as a wife.  Her opinion was not to her benefit.

We have been married for 25 years.  God is continuing to change both of us to walk with Him.  One of the first things God did ( see the testimony  My Sheep Hear My Voice ) to convince me that I could hear Him was to speak to me about being the spiritual head of our family.  Our relationship is not a 50/50 thing.  God directs me and I lead the family.  That does not mean that He cannot speak to Kathie.  If she is to walk in the Gospel on a daily basis, she has to hear Him.  A Christian family can only be one way:

1 Corinthians 11:3
But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

Christ is my head and He leads me daily.  I wait to hear what He tells me, and then I do it.  He has instructed me that I am to love Kathie as He loves the church;

Ephesians 5

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